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Whatever decisions you made over primary schooling, secondary school is a new situation with a new set of circumstances.
Now that your children are older, it’s important to ask them for their opinion. Encourage them to feel involved in the decision without feeling responsible for it.
The issue of separation may still arise at secondary school if, for example, your twins or triplets have not been separated at primary or junior school. If this is the case, make sure you prepare your multiples for separation, visit the school and talk to teachers.
You may decide to send your children to separate schools if you have more than one secondary in your area. Talk this through with your children and make sure you visit all schools to find out what one would work best for the children’s individual needs.
Some schools may have a selection process in place (the 11 plus exams or entrance exams) one child might pass the test and another fail, highlighting academic differences which may cause upset. If your children are going to take these exams it would be worth talking to them before of the possible outcomes
Twins Trust experience shows that for many twins and triplets, the ideal situation would be to have them in separate classes before they even reach secondary school so they are already seen as individuals and have their own group of friends. If separate classes has not been possible then different interests or hobbies can be encouraged.
You as parents are the best to decide whether they should be kept together or apart.
If you are unable to reach a satisfactory conclusion with your school and need help, we have a group of professional volunteers who can assist with any disputes and offer advice.
They are all volunteers and professionals in their own field (teachers, psychologists, speech therapists) and often parents of twins or triplets.
Applying for grammar school?
Are you thinking of letting your children take an exam for a grammar school or other selective school? Every parent wants their children to have the best possible education, but is this the most important criterion in your choice of schools?
What if only one child passes? Some parents contact Twins Trust to say that they thought it was worth a try just in case they passed, but they hadn't seriously considered the possibility that one may pass and the other(s) not.
If the most important consideration for your children is that they both/all go to the same school, then do think carefully before letting them take an exam. Talk to them (preferably separately) to find out what is most important to each of them.
If the primary school can provide written evidence that your children have had very similar test results for the past 2 or 3 years, then Twins Trust may be able to help you with an appeal, but there would certainly be no guarantee of success. So do think very carefully before making this decision.
